still trying to understand.

Now i understand Asian cultures i minored in sociology ,and loved it. but there are two things im still in awe about. it seems that everyone else raises everyone else's children. that was something so different to me im in total shock about it. i understand its done because family members need to work, but wow.
now here's the big one my atawa (her dialect) family is in all turmoil over this one person who is not family.
it seems her second oldest brother met this women ,and may have asked her to marry him (its unclear),and then went to Taiwan to work. then this women decided to move into my atawas brothers home witch is next to my atawas family's homes (several brothers an sisters) and left her children to be raised by her ex-inlaws (like i said i don't understand) we willl call this women the witch for purpose of conversation and description. the witch has been there for several months ,and has caused so much trouble its tearing the family apart. everyone has asked her to leave ,but my atawa mother likes her ,and wont allow it. its almost like she's lost sense of reality. in 24 years of my atawas life her mother has never had to yell at her, but today was her birthday ,and her mother was screaming at her because of what the witch was telling my atawa's mother (the witch was gossiping). now i was there for her family to meet an greet for only a few days ,and i picked up immediately that no one liked the witch even a 5 year old would throw rocks at the witch the children hated her all the men laughed at her, i felt sorry for her till i noticed that she was causing trouble there, i found out my atawas brother (the witches fiance) had a son from a previous marriage the boy is 9, after 1 week he decided to leave and live with his mothers family rather then being around the witch. i started to see the witch take control of the pig roast they where having in my honor telling everyone what to do an not to do and telling people to leave etc etc etc. anyone that spoke out against the witch my atawas mother would come to defend the witch. now my question?? what in the world would make a mother go against her entire family to defend this women?? currently my atawa and the oldest brother (and mommas favorite son too) both live in makati are on there way to get the witch out of the house ,and away from the family. they've contacted her brother in Taiwan ,and he agrees the witch needs to go. i know every family has issues but i couldn't even imagine something like this. i basically gave them my opinion on calling the entire family to all go there ,and pack her stuff buy her a 1 way bus ticket back home ,and not let her mother get involved. but im a bull in a china shop everywhere i go. my atawa is different

[MrkGrismer]

Sounds like somebody has 'dirt' on somebody.

not sure why her mother did this, but as of today the family went and removed her from the house ,and put her on a bus. my atawa is the youngest in the family ,but it seems she was the leader in throwing her out.

not really sure why the mother couldnt see the truth about the trouble the witch was causing, like most filipino's her family is extremely friendly kind and helpful i think that the witch may have been taking advantage of the situation.

just reading this title of the forum thread adjusting to filipino culture would fit this problem. in any situation anything can occur i just never could understand or even imagine a situation like this

I dont know why your so shocked that other family members raise thier kid's. It happen's here in the US all the time. A side from working at the post office as a mail man , I also drive a school bus and from what I see there's a lot of kid's being raised by grandparents.
Here in the US where we have the drive thru divorce like going to McDonalds, every time theres a divorce the grandparents get the kids dumped on them so the parents can run to the bars and look for the next sucker.
Then you have the foster parents lol for the most part thats a joke. There are some great people that are foster parents but some do it for the money and other do it coz they like little kids. I think you get my meaning.
I think the family's in the Philippines helping each other raise the kids is a good thing. It helps keep the family close.
TIM

Originally Posted by HAWK

I dont know why your so shocked that other family members raise thier kid's. It happen's here in the US all the time. A side from working at the post office as a mail man , I also drive a school bus and from what I see there's a lot of kid's being raised by grandparents.
Here in the US where we have the drive thru divorce like going to McDonalds, every time theres a divorce the grandparents get the kids dumped on them so the parents can run to the bars and look for the next sucker.
Then you have the foster parents lol for the most part thats a joke. There are some great people that are foster parents but some do it for the money and other do it coz they like little kids. I think you get my meaning.
I think the family's in the Philippines helping each other raise the kids is a good thing. It helps keep the family close.
TIM

i guess i should be more clearer in what im shocked at and it not meant to be negative. the idea of a child being away from her parents for years at a time is something im uncustomed too. true grandparent in the US often have to raise there childrens children. but the way they do it in the philippines is very very different. the family strength of a filipino family in my opinion is second to none. like i said though the witch left her children with her in-laws to go be with another man and his child thats something a little uncharacteristic for a filipino

I agree 100 %

[MrkGrismer]

Note also that there was a time when western children were raised by others as well. The term 'foster' used to refer to sending a child off to live with an affluent patron so that they could learn by living and serving in another setting. This was most prevalent during the middle ages, but I believe the practice also survived into the renaisance. The Master-apprentice relationship also was closely related.

I didn't read it but go Sox.

Originally Posted by Rik

I didn't read it but go Sox.

lol i hate baseball boring as all hell. patriot football and nascar thats me

Originally Posted by Danoco

now my question?? what in the world would make a mother go against her entire family to defend this women?? currently my atawa and the oldest brother (and mommas favorite son too) both live in makati are on there way to get the witch out of the house ,and away from the family. they've contacted her brother in Taiwan ,and he agrees the witch needs to go. i know every family has issues but i couldn't even imagine something like this. i basically gave them my opinion on calling the entire family to all go there ,and pack her stuff buy her a 1 way bus ticket back home ,and not let her mother get involved. but im a bull in a china shop everywhere i go. my atawa is different

Danoco:

Is your lady's brother in Taiwan supporting the whole family through his wages because the witch is living with them? If so, perhaps that could be one reason why the mother is being so protective of her. If the witch leaves or is thrown out, perhaps the brother may be angered enough not to send any more support money home. Finances and financial gain could be some of the reasons behind all this.

Sincerely,

Herb